BALANCE GEEK

I am Maria Clara, a positive, happy person, curious to get to know people better, which undoubtedly motivated me to study Psychology. What was impossible to imagine was that one of my classmates, Juan Gabriel, would end up being my husband.

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After 15 years with a professional life in Colombia, almost always in the area of Human Resources, in 2011 we decided not only to move to the USA to offer a better future for our children who were 4 and 2 years old at that time, but also that I would dedicate to them full time.

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Without a doubt, both decisions were the best. However, there were many days of uncertainty and tears shed because I felt that I was losing not only my status as a professional, but also a large part of my identity as a woman.

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Our first son, Juan José, was born in 2007. I felt full, with everything under control. I was a happy mother, with a wonderful husband, in a city that offered us everything and more than we dreamed of both socially and professionally. And suddenly, at the end of 2009, everything changed.

A routine prenatal medical visit turned into an emergency C-section for fetal distress. Our second son, Alejandro, came into our life a month earlier, with many complications and 22 days in intensive care.   

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This situation completely collapsed the illusion of control that I thought I had over my life. The magical experience of motherhood and illusion, faith and optimism in the future, were brutally replaced by deep sadness, anguish, uncertainty, and feelings of guilt.

What did I do wrong? What could I have done better? How can one enjoy life again after such a traumatic event? Several years went by without feeling truly happy again, however, now I fully understand that this difficult moment became a new beginning for me as a woman and for us as a couple and as a family.

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Not even my 15 years of professional experience as a psychologist could prepare me for the profound distress and devastating sadness of having a child with special needs.  

I felt very sad, alone. It was so hard for me to see my friends with their healthy children that I unconsciously walked away from them, which obviously made the feeling of loneliness worse.

In the midst of the stress of medical diagnoses, official procedures, trying to balance our professional obligations with the demanding time of two small children, we received the news of my husband's job transfer to the USA.

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At first I went into absolute denial mode. My life was already “upside down”, more so in a well-known city and in my native language. It was unthinkable to consider additional changes. After much dialogue and analysis, we decided to accept the transfer so that we can all stay together as a family. 

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The children quickly adapted to their new surroundings. Mainly because of them, I appeared to be strong and well, but inside, the days were countless hours of anxiety. I slept poorly, gained weight, and left myself the last priority on my daily agenda. I felt totally lost. I didn't even know where to begin to process the reality of having a child with a disability, with cerebral palsy and general development delayed, who will depend forever and for everything on me. 

I dreamed of getting back on track again and living the life I deserved, a happy and balanced life. It was not easy at all, but I did it! It was not a blink of an eye, a book, a treatment or a magic pill. The change was only possible when I understood that the root of my agony and my unhappiness was my own attitude.

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I needed to put myself first, so that I could help my children and other people. I needed to accept my unchangeable reality, with love and not guilt. I needed to rediscover my passion for good nutrition, exercise, and healthy habits to feel self-esteem and well-being again.

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I am fully aware of my ability to make my own decisions, and the freedom I give myself to explore new perspectives. I am the one who offers myself a life full of possibilities, optimism and hope.

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The challenges of being a mother, especially of a special child, never end, but I confess that I have managed to find my inner balance point.

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From my life testimony, it is very clear to me that helping other women to change their habits and transform their lives is my true passion. That's why I decided to officially certify myself in Modern Nutrition endorsed by the Global University of Florida and as a Health Coach in the Functional Medicine Coaching Academy.

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Do you want to transform your life from the change of habits and in a sustainable way? I want to help you, write me and I will get back to you soon.